THE WORD THAT BUILDS UP

By: Pastor Flávio Macieira - 2025

Day 3 of the "Imperfect Love: Grace for the Relationships That Wear Us Out" series.

Imagine you arrive at a construction site. On one side, you see a skilled bricklayer who takes each brick carefully, sets it with precision, and joins it to the others with strong mortar, building a solid and secure wall. On the other side, you see a demolition expert who uses dynamite to blow up a structure, turning what was solid into a cloud of dust and rubble. Every day, in our relationships, we are given the same tools: our words. With them, we can be builders, adding bricks of encouragement and security to someone's life, or we can be demolishers, using explosions of criticism and sarcasm to tear down another's self-worth. The choice is ours in every conversation.

In the last two days, we learned to bear with and to forgive, which are attitudes of the heart. Today, we move to the front lines of imperfect love: our mouths. The Bible is incredibly clear about the power of life and death we carry on our tongues. Paul, writing to a young church, gave them the foundational instruction for building a healthy community.

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 (NIV)

The two key words here are "encourage" and "build up." To encourage literally means "to put courage into." It's lending our strength to someone who is weak, validating their feelings, reminding them of who they are in Christ. It's the opposite of discouraging, which is "to take courage from." To build up is our construction site metaphor. It means to construct, brick by brick. A word of affirmation, a sincere compliment, an "I believe in you"—these are bricks that build a person's security and value. Criticism, gossip, and constant complaining are the dynamites that create cracks and eventually cause the structure to collapse.

Where do we get the power to be builders? Just as in the previous days, the strength comes from the grace we have received. Jesus is the Master Builder. Instead of demolishing us for our faults, He built us up on the Rock. His words to us are always of life, hope, and restoration. He encouraged us by calling us "friends" and "children." When our hearts are full of the way Christ builds us up, our words to others naturally begin to carry the same materials. We stop using the dynamite of criticism because we know how destructive it is, and we pick up the brick of encouragement because we know its life-giving power.

Your Next Step of Faith: Today's step of faith is a "Building Project." Choose one person in your life whom you have been tempted to criticize or discourage. Your mission, today, is the opposite. Send a text, make a call, or tell them in person something that deliberately "puts courage into" them. Be specific. Tell them a quality you admire, thank them for something they did, or simply say you're cheering for them. Lay one "brick" of edification.

The Soul Mirror:

1. In your closest relationships, have your words been more like bricks or dynamite lately?

2. What is your "default criticism"? The one complaint you repeatedly make about a spouse, child, or friend?

3. Remember a word of encouragement someone said to you that left a deep impact. How can that inspire you to do the same for others?

Let's ask God to transform our speech.

Lord, Master Builder, I confess that I often use my words to tear down instead of build up. My tongue is quick to criticize and slow to encourage. Forgive me for the rubble I have caused in others' lives. Fill my heart with Your grace so that out of the abundance of the heart, my mouth will speak life. Transform me into an agent of edification, someone who puts courage into others, just as You have done for me. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Broken people break people. People built by Christ build people.

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